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Cheese(F-in)Cake Time!

Choco-Yo-Butt-On- Triple Chocolate Oreo Cheesecake

I was gonna name this one - Choco-Yo-Butt-Off - but that would just be a fucking lie about this cheese cake. Each piece is like a million calories. Soon this is going to turn into a weight loss blog if I keep sleep eating cheesecake.. Oh, have I mentioned I sleep eat..? Sounds pretty weird, right.. ? Once a long time ago I was prescribed Ambien which made me sleepwalk, and sleep eat. Long after I stopped taking Ambien I have continued to sleep eat. It sounds hilarious... right.. ? Waking up covered in BBQ Sauce or covered in Kiwi residue... But it's not so fun when you're falling asleep eating a Philly Cheesesteak.... and falling asleep while chewing.. Lol... It's actually kind of dangerous... But since I mentioned cheese lets get on with it here... : ) 

 ------------------CHEESECAKE---------------------

First (gather ingredients) - Let 1 Stick of Butter and 4 Packages of cream cheese become soft to room temp. Next quarter 20 Oreos and set aside. This is the pic above *insert arrow here, pointing up* Also - Preheat oven to 325 degrees.


Next crush remaining Oreos with half stick of butter and put in your "springform" pan. Our springform pan happens to be a springform bunt cake pan but, who's looking for accuracy today..? - Once this is accomplished Bake crust for 10 minutes and remove from oven. 
ALSO (and this is really important)


      BEFORE doing crust or pouring batter, Butter your springform pan with - ANY OIL you so choose. I PREFER but do not RECOMMEND Crisco, butter flavor in which to do this. (see, how this is a heart attack cheesecake..?)


While waiting on crust to bake, start on filling. Add your vanilla, four packages of cream cheese (and we did use Philly this time), one cup of sugar, and... CREAM with mixer til the state of thick pudding. Then add four eggs, one at a time. Set aside.

Now, don't forget to pull crust out of oven.

Next, start melting your Semi Sweet Bakers Chocolate in the microwave however the directions on package suggest until you get a nice melty consistency. When chocolate is properly melted (sorry I got too carried away with licking the measuring cup to take a pic of what it looks like melted)


Add melted Bakers Chocolate to previous cream cheese mixture. FOLD in half those Oreos you quartered and set aside remaining. Pour into pan! (lick beaters, bowl, and all that has chocolate on it. Fuck, it if it has raw egg in it. Salmonella is a choice, people... And I live on the edge.) - and a special ps for everybody - DON'T LICK ANYTHING THAT SOMEONE ELSE IS GOING TO EAT, Duh.


It should look like this in your pan.. 


Then, it should look like this with remaining Oreos sprinkled on top. Bake for 50 minutes at 325.


Then it should look like this and slightly jiggly in the center. : ) Let set up in fridge for overnight OR four hours. Make sure Cheesecake is completely cool before putting in fridge or you will get condensation and NOBODY wants a sweaty cake.

And finally... after all that hablooey... EAT A FUCKING PIECE OF CAKE. After you release cheesecake from pan of course!


Because we used a spring form bundt pan you will never get it over the metal thingy so don't even try.. we almost f-ed it up... : )
THEN


Enjoy that piece of cake.. cuz after all... YOU did work so hard on it : ) 

Recipe Here, Ya'll

What You Need

32 OREO Chocolate Creme Cookies, divided
4 pkg.  (8 oz. each) PHILADELPHIA Cream Cheese, softened
1 cup  sugar
1 tsp.  vanilla
2 pkg.  (4 oz. each) BAKER'S Semi-Sweet Chocolate, broken into pieces, melted, cooled
4 eggs
 (I added 1/2 cup butter to the crust layer, eventho it doesn't call for it, because it's my personal belief that - BUTTER IS EVERYTHING)

Make It

HEAT oven to 325°F.
QUARTER 20 cookies; set aside. Finely crush remaining cookies; press onto bottom of 9-inch springform pan sprayed with cooking spray. Bake 10 min.
BEAT cream cheese, sugar and vanilla with mixer until well blended. Add chocolate; mix well. Add eggs, 1 at a time, mixing on low speed after each just until blended. Gently stir in 1-1/2 cups of the quartered cookies. Pour over crust. Sprinkle with remaining quartered cookies.
BAKE 50 min. to 1 hour or until center is almost set. Run knife around rim of pan to loosen cake; cool before removing rim. Refrigerate 4 hours. 


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